This is Miss Manners AKA Judith Martin. This blog is an imaginative look at her reaction to a belching contest.
"Disgraceful! I was quite appalled to see these acts of vulgarity being rewarded. We are becoming a society of perfect beasts. The sounds emanating from these people were so crass that I don’t mind telling you I was on the brink of fainting. Have these people no shame? After seeing it with my own eyes, I still cannot believe that contests such as this exist. What’s next, celebrating the passing of gas? I don’t know who to feel more ashamed for, the contestants or the audience. How could someone degrade themselves as to support such a foul competition? I suppose the days of manners and politeness are gone forever. I am merely a relic of a simpler time when bodily noises were to be pardoned not praised."