Monday, August 24, 2009

Beginnings

Happy Birthday to Me
About two years ago, I began completing a list of 100 things to do in 2007. It was the beginning of a chaotic year. I would eventually leave my home state of Indiana and move to South Carolina for a teaching job. The moving, teaching, and new surroundings all conspired to keep me from completing my list; however, I did complete 68 of my tasks. Which isn't too shabby if I do say so myself.
Here is a sample of what I completed:
* Drink pop rocks and coke

*Carve a pumpkinI know the tasks aren't exactly earth-shattering in difficulty, but I still had to work for a living.
Now it is over two years later, and I am back in Indiana, still teaching, but in familiar surroundings, and I have just turned 30 years old today. I am proposing something that is a bit on the lofty side. I am taking the 100 things to do and multiplying it by 10. I'm giving myself 1000 days to complete 1000 tasks. Can I do it? I'm not sure, but if I can, May 21, 2012 will be an auspicious date. If I complete my task, I am throwing the biggest celebration ever. I'm seeing banners, lawn chairs, and a six pack of Bartles&Jaymes (hey, it's Indiana, we don't get too crazy).
So now, it is off to the list. I'm not going to put these in any particular order because I cannot foresee the future. If you peruse the list, you'll notice a few things. The first is that there are actually only 930 items on the list. This is because I'll be adding to the list as time goes by. I'm going to make a rule not to subtract, but I should be able to have some wiggle room when it comes to this. The second thing that you may notice is that a lot of these so-called "experiences" begin with "Find out about..." This is because I am not rich so I still have to work for a freaking living which means that I cannot spend every day jumping out of an airplane (I don't think that is on the list...I kind of hope not. I have been compiling this list for about a month).
Let me know what you think about the list if you want to leave a comment. I could probably use your cheers and words of encouragement. I don't need them, but I could always use them. Today, I am crossing off #1 on the list. (I hope this blog isn't too similar to the plot of My Name is Earl...screw him, it got canceled).


  1. Start a blog
  2. Make a wish at a fountain
  3. Visit Crater Lake
  4. Visit the Seattle Space Needle
  5. Visit London
  6. Visit Hawaii
  7. Go to Kings Island
  8. Install hardwood floors in the living room
  9. Install a backsplash in the kitchen
  10. Redo the kitchen floor
  11. Edit my novel
  12. Write a screenplay
  13. Go to a hockey game
  14. Fix a multi-course French Dinner
  15. Try Ethiopian food
  16. Play a game of Monopoly
  17. Play a game of Cornhole
  18. Learn to say “hello” in 12 languages
  19. Write a letter to Santa Claus
  20. See a parade
  21. Visit a psychic
  22. See an elementary school play
  23. See the PMO Christmas Show
  24. Read To the Lighthouse by Virginia Woolf
  25. Read The Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger
  26. Read Madam Bovary by Gustav Flaubert
  27. Read The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams
  28. Read Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
  29. Read The Grapes of Wrath by John Steinbeck
  30. Read The Tibetan Book of the Dead
  31. Watch The Godfather
  32. Watch The Godfather Part II
  33. Watch The Godfather Part III
  34. Watch Lawrence of Arabia
  35. Watch To Catch a Thief
  36. Watch Charade
  37. Watch (500) Days of Summer
  38. Watch Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
  39. Watch Pirates of the Caribbean : Dead Man’s Chest
  40. Watch Pirates of the Caribbean : At World’s End
  41. Make a soufflé
  42. Go to a wedding
  43. Go to a catholic church service
  44. Create a new recipe for something
  45. Create a new alcoholic drink
  46. Get a goldfish
  47. Try Nutella
  48. Weigh 140 lbs
  49. Play Tennis
  50. Write a poem
  51. Write and academic essay on “Tom and Jerry”
  52. Eat a banana split
  53. Fast for one day
  54. Eat at a sushi restaurant
  55. See a clown
  56. Work the word “vociferous” seamlessly into a conversation
  57. Research volcanoes
  58. Go bowling
  59. Par at least three holes in a round of golf
  60. Go hiking
  61. Eat duck
  62. Meet a franchise mascot (real or plastic)
  63. Play Powerball
  64. Make Smores in the oven
  65. Make a podcast
  66. Make a classroom website
  67. Read the Book of Revelations
  68. Donate blood
  69. Get an Ipod
  70. Sing Karaoke
  71. Go down a waterslide
  72. Buy a new office chair
  73. Raise awareness for a charitable cause
  74. Write a letter to a magazine
  75. Make up a funny T-shirt Slogan
  76. Eat lobster
  77. Go to a haunted house
  78. Make a cake from scratch
  79. Weave a basket
  80. Build a piece of furniture
  81. Buy a cordless handsaw
  82. Learn to play a Christmas song on the piano
  83. Eat something with kiwi in it
  84. Eat a Grand Slam at Denny’s
  85. Buy fresh flowers
  86. Play a game of Trivial Pursuit
  87. Get a Nintendo Wii
  88. Create a new theory about Lost
  89. Give a fake name at Starbucks
  90. See bison
  91. Draw a picture of Bigfoot
  92. Stand on my head for five minutes
  93. Drive on Brad, Bradley or Ramsay Street (Boulevard, Avenue or Road)
  94. Paint a picture on a canvas
  95. Volunteer for a charity
  96. Be a raw food vegan for a day
  97. Run the bases on a baseball field
  98. Participate in a water fight
  99. Learn more about Past Lives

100. Buy something from a Farmer’s market

101. Start my master’s degree

102. Invest some money in the stock market

103. Visit a financial planner

104. Learn every current African capital

105. Get a massage

106. Get a signed photo from a celebrity

107. Install a ceiling fan

108. Watch Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist

109. See Daniel Tosh do standup

110. Get an expensive tie

111. Go to the eye doctor

112. Buy new couch pillows

113. Get a piggy bank

114. Buy a yo-yo

115. Sleep on the floor

116. Memorize the Gettysburg Address

117. Eat a plum

118. Make a pie

119. Update my résumé

120. Visit the Covered Bridge Festival

121. Go to the zoo

122. Submit a story to Fmylife.com

123. Sit around a bonfire

124. Go on a random Sunday drive

125. Order an insane combo at Coldstone Creamery

126. Put up curtains

127. Read the London Times

128. Make a Jewish dinner

129. Eat a gyro

130. Get a library card

131. Play a game of mini golf

132. Play a game of pinball

133. Build a playing card castle

134. Buy new sandals

135. Eat at Bistro 501

136. Eat at Chick-Fil-A

137. Have a beer at Harry’s Chocolate Shop

138. Eat at Main Street Wine and Cheese

139. Sleep outside

140. Decide on a personal hero

141. Write a song parody

142. Go fishing

143. See fireworks

144. Watch a soccer game

145. Dress like a cowboy

146. Make a meatball sub

147. Have a root beer float

148. Play a round of Sex, marry, kill

149. Memorize at least five quotes by Thoreau

150. Go ice skating

151. See what my kids would look like if Mona Lisa was the mother

152. Write a treatment of my very first book idea “The Name Game”

153. Research Rastafarianism

154. Learn about five phobias

155. Create a perfect day

156. Go to the State Fair

157. Learn about Burning Man

158. Buy something at Abercrombie

159. Research Buddhism

160. Learn about Norse Mythology

161. Color with crayons

162. Go sledding

163. Play a game of Taboo

164. Play a game of scrabble

165. Watch something on PBS

166. Buy a weed eater

167. Run through a sprinkler

168. Try Flintstones vitamins

169. Learn the words to “Informer”

170. Research unusual vacation spots

171. Read a book by a sports legend

172. Play a game of euchre

173. Play a game of charades

174. Look through the old high school yearbook

175. Landscape the yard better

176. Decide if less filling really does taste great

177. Find out what happened to the Dunkin Donuts guy

178. Watch an episode of Alf

179. Find out why Disco was so popular in the 70s

180. Figure out if butter or margarine is better for you

181. Make Eggs Florentine

182. Decide if Snuggle or Downy is better than generic fabric softener

183. Try Chi Tea

184. Watch some documentary on the Loch Ness Monster

185. Find out what the Boer Wars were about

186. Ponder Global Climate change

187. Make a list of your all time favorite movies

188. Make a list of your all time favorite television shows

189. Decide what kind of cheese you like best

190. Find out if supercalifragilisticexpialidocious is actually a word

191. Eat Nachos from Taco Bell

192. Eat a dipped cone

193. Eat at Panda Express

194. Find out how big a dram is

195. Find out where the unit of measurement “hogshead” originated from.

196. Grind your own coffee beans

197. Find out if there really is a tribe of African pygmies or if it is just racist drivel

198. Find a video clip of Charlize Theron speaking Afrikaans

199. Find out what makes Cubs fans so loyal

200. Research the origin of the term “get bent”

201. Find out what’s really in a hot dog

202. Find out what the Hippocratic Oath actually says

203. Read the bulletin board in the super market

204. Find the most expensive country to live in.

205. Ponder why so many Americans feel entitlement

206. Retell the “The Legend of Sleepy Hollow” using as few words as possible.

207. Order something ridiculous from the Internet

208. Find the origin of the term “hemming and hawing”

209. Find out what laws Spiro Agnew broke.

210. Find out why Yankee Doodle called a feather in his hat “macaroni”

211. Decorate the outside of the house in December

212. Find out how people are knighted

213. Learn all you can about ice volcanoes

214. Found out how tourist friendly Islamabad, Pakistan is.

215. Read the story of Jason and the Argonauts

216. Read “The Purloined Letter” by Edgar Allan Poe

217. Reorganize the kitchen

218. Find out what’s in the “Beyond” section of Bed, Bath and Beyond

219. Read up on common clichés

220. Find out what’s the deal with the Cookie Monster

221. Reflect on Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood

222. Find out what the lyrics to “Ave Maria” mean.

223. Find out how grandfather clocks got their names

224. Research the world’s most famous hurricanes

225. Find out who Plutarch and Petrarch were.

226. Make potato chips from scratch

227. Write a letter to yourself in 30 years

228. Skip rocks

229. Read about Pitcairn

230. Do a cannonball into a pool

231. Play Connect Four

232. Get a friend to cross something off the list for you and blog about it.

233. Design a great paper airplane

234. Eat tapas

235. Find and rank your five best photographs

236. Try a flavor of milkshake that you’ve never had

237. Eat a 5th Avenue Bar

238. Find out why a bunch of people wear Manchester United shirts

239. Learn at least one phrase in Icelandic

240. Read about Eric the Red and Leif Erickson

241. Try to cook something Polynesian

242. Read about Seychelles

243. Read up on opium

244. Decide whether you are a republican or a democrat

245. Analyze the children’s song “Miss Suzy”

246. Order something from Hickory Farms

247. Find the best/worst places to live in the U.S.

248. Ride on a boat

249. Write a haiku

250. Find out the difference between gelato and ice cream

251. Get nostalgic about something

252. Walk around Purdue’s campus

253. Decide on your personal music top ten

254. Write a letter to Homer Simpson

255. Imagine what you’d do with $100 million.

256. Try some different cleaning product brands

257. Remember El Nino?

258. Make fudge

259. Make sweet potato fries

260. Make something with Tofu in it

261. Weigh the pros and cons of a tattoo

262. Re-read Deadline

263. Play a game of Scattergories

264. Play a game of Catch Phrase

265. Play a game of Cranium

266. Visit a casino

267. Pray for something that is tangible

268. Look up information on Voltron

269. Look up information on the Thundercats

270. Study the Phoenicians

271. Look up the seven wonders of the ancient world

272. Spend an afternoon in downtown Lafayette

273. Make Chicken ala King

274. Find out where I can play Jezzball online

275. Buy Girl Scout cookies

276. Find out who Heloise is and what her hints are

277. Make something out of gingerbread

278. Decide on the best mouthwash

279. Find out about what makes Blu-Ray so great.

280. Find out why anyone would go to a Renaissance Fair

281. Design a pseudonym and try it out

282. Read directions on how to properly do the laundry

283. Find out how big a boat has to be to qualify as a yacht

284. Find out where world’s largest igloo is located

285. Decide on the funniest movie

286. Decide on the scariest movie

287. Research paranoid schizophrenics

288. Read an issue of Gear Magazine

289. Read an issue of Esquire

290. Buy a shirt at Goodwill

291. Find out why people like NASCAR

292. Find out what goose stepping is.

293. Find out the best thing Grover Cleveland did while president

294. Check out a book from the library

295. Make a list and count your blessings

296. Try to make some sort of jelly or jam

297. Read about crazy utopian experiments

298. Find out your blood type

299. Draw obscure connections between totally unrelated things in a faux-academic paper.

300. Find out why girls and women seem to be in love with the Twilight series

301. Find out if Greasers and Socs still exist

302. Buy a good blender

303. Fix my bad cabinet drawer

304. Find out if Shamu is still alive and if he is as big as the analogies say

305. Learn how to juggle something for at least five seconds.

306. Write an editorial on a subversive issue

307. Vote in a non-presidential election

308. Take a stroll through Columbia Park

309. Go to someone’s house for dinner (non-family member)

310. Rant about something

311. Rave about something

312. Find out where Koolade was invented

313. Find out if a Pickle Festival exists

314. Work the phrase “Tuscaloosa Heart” into a conversation.

315. Find out where I’ve heart the phrase “Little Matchbook Girl”

316. Buy new tube socks

317. Buy new underwear

318. Eat bouillabaisse

319. Find out who the Hatfields and McCoys are

320. See a tractor pull

321. See a demolition derby

322. Ride in a go cart

323. Take a Meyer’s-Briggs test

324. Work the word “alacrity” into everyday conversation

325. Find out what an anthropologist does.

326. Find out how to start a museum

327. Experience schadenfreunde

328. Decide whether or not Lizzie Borden did it

329. Spend an hour at a book store

330. hang out at a coffeehouse

331. Find out the origin of Groundhog Day

332. Find out the least populous state capital

333. Theorize on which came first…the chicken or the egg

334. Complain about what’s wrong with the next generation

335. Drink champagne in the bathtub

336. Research Chopin

337. Find out who the Muses are and what they stand for

338. Find out if Genghis Khan and Kubla Khan have some sort of connection

339. Pick a definitive song for the 80s, 90s, 2000s.

340. Make butterscotch pudding

341. Find out if Diet Dr Pepper tastes more like regular Dr Pepper

342. Find out the benefits of iodized salt versus regular salt

343. Find out what Vitamin C does for your body

344. Find out if there are ever benefits from using a straw.

345. Discover what cloves are and use them for something

346. Listen to only classical music for one day (no other forms of entertainment)

347. Make some sort of combination of apple/lemon cake

348. Come up with a master plan

349. Revisit your childhood

350. Jump on a trampoline

351. Shout with glee about something

352. Find out more about Laura Ingalls Wilder

353. Think about the problems in the world

354. Think about Pandora’s box

355. Describe the feeling of envy

356. Find out if Trix are really only for kids

357. Correct the grammar in a hiphop song

358. Analyze the song “Minnie the Moocher”

359. Find out what the deal with the Blarney Stone is

360. Find out more about the potato famine

361. Decide who the most influential person in the world has been

362. Watch a sunset

363. See a shooting star

364. Find out what an earwig is

365. Find out if Zaccheus was a little person

366. Find out why Michael Flatley is the “Lord of the Dance”

367. Attend a lecture

368. Find five reasons to visit Delaware

369. Find out when an American flag is generally flown at half mast

370. Find out if Humble Pie is a real thing

371. Find out why Grammar Girl calls her tips “quick and dirty”

372. Decide who your best teacher was

373. Imagine what life would have been like if you’d gone to a different college

374. Talk about the best experience you’ve done on the list so far

375. Eat a corndog

376. Reminisce with someone

377. Change your ring tone

378. Find out what the difference is between precious gems

379. See if you can understand British humor

380. Find out what grossology is

381. Find out if chinchillas make good pets

382. Figure out who your favorite explorer is

383. Figure out who was worse Cortes or Pizarro

384. Find out more about the Iroquois Nation

385. Find out how Sugar Creek got its name

386. Visit a covered bridge

387. Blog while drunk

388. Figure out what your biggest fears are

389. Learn about the Spanish Inquisition

390. Find out the difference between draught and draft

391. Find out what happened to the character of Biff Loman

392. Rag on a celebrity

393. Find out what manganese is used for

394. Decide who the best literary villain is

395. Decide who the best literary hero is

396. Find out why Captain Ahab was obsessed with Moby Dick

397. Vomit sunshine for a day

398. Learn the words to “Jeepers Creepers”

399. Spend two hours at home with the electricity turned off

400. Cook something that you see on television

401. Ponder what the blog is about

402. Find out why you love Sabrina Soto so much

403. Find out the different names for animal herds

404. Decide what is the best grape soda

405. Write about all the attributes of Rashida Jones

406. Find out why Oscar is such a grouch

407. Find out if ontology really does recapitulate phylogeny

408. Find out if its better to summer or winter in Aspen

409. Try a Drake’s coffee cake

410. Work the word “craptastic” into everyday conversation

411. Meditate

412. Find someone who is named Clovis

413. Find out why garlic keep vampires away

414. Buy a better digital camera

415. Find out if Punky Brewster really can turn my world around

416. Try to work the word “smurf” into conversation as many times as you can

417. See how many euphemisms you can come up with for defecate

418. Decide whether Marco Polo would approve of the game that is named after him

419. Find out if anyone has actually ever really levitated

420. Research telekinesis and find out if it is even possible

421. Choose your favorite sitcom lines

422. Find out if Zelda and Link ever got together

423. Find out if that frog ever got across the road

424. Find out what a plumber was doing in King Koopa’s domain

425. Decide who killed John Boddy.

426. Decide on the songs that make people happy

427. Decide on the songs that make people fall in love

428. Research the attributes of green tea

429. Discuss whether people are truly happy

430. Research depression

431. Decide what Arnold Palmer will be best remembered for.

432. Figure out if Leighton Meister is a good name or not for an actress

433. Look up the side effects for Dramamine

434. What’s the best phonetic pronunciation John, Jean, or Juan

435. Think about the French words that are in the English language

436. Figure out who would win: Principal Skinner vs. Principal Belding

437. Make a new friend

438. Fall in love

439. Find out what happiness means

440. Become a fanatic about something

441. Listen to the birds

442. Figure out if lava lamps will ever come back into style

443. Write a poem about my treadmill

444. Figure out who is the best Looney Tunes character.

445. Figure out why Van Gogh never got to be a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle

446. Figure out if the Stay Puff Marshmallow man is just a giant version of the Pillsbury Doughboy

447. Figure out which one of the Friends you’d want as an actual friend

448. Find out why you love Edgar Allan Poe

449. Find out why the Minister wore a Black Veil

450. Write the song “Mandy” as a short story…but adding no details that aren’t there.

451. Figure out if Murphy Brown and Dan Quayle can let bygones be bygones

452. Figure out if Sam Beckett ever made it home

453. Write about Zora Neale Hurston

454. Figure out what “drop it like its hot” means

455. Who’s the best fake doctor, Dr. Dre, Dr Pepper, Dr. Crane or Dr. Evil

456. Figure out why television shows used to have “very special episodes.”

457. Figure out why you never cry

458. Figure out why people are afraid of spiders

459. Ponder what life would be like if you’d become an entomologist

460. Recount who “Brad Ferguson” is.

461. Remember why you liked raking hay.

462. Find out what different colored roses mean.

463. Take a walk on the wild side

464. Find out what a “sloppy jalopy” is.

465. Find out why Showbiz Pizza became Chuck E. Cheese.

466. Share something personal

467. Find out why Mickey is so fine

468. Find out what the uses are for quadratic equations

469. Figure out why sss is the sound a snake makes, but zzz is the sound of sleeping

470. Remember your favorite canceled television shows

471. Find out whether Dr. Faustus made a mistake

472. Imagine how football would be different if punting wasn’t an option

473. Find out what “punting on the Thames” means

474. Find out if the heat is actually on the street

475. Find out if people still wear top hats

476. Imagine what Miss Manners would say about a belching contest

477. Figure out how Cinderella could make a mistake a kiss a snake

478. Find out why we were going to Kentucky and going to the fair

479. Find out why someone would stick a needle in their eye

480. Find out how camels can pass through the eye of a needle

481. Unveil the embarrassing youtube video that you made

482. Embrace your weirdness

483. Find out if Andrew Carnegie was a jerk until he donated money to libraries

484. Find out how locomotive and to educate both came to mean train

485. Figure out if Betty Boop was an idiot

486. Analyze the character of Wilma Flinstone

487. Find out what uggs are.

488. Find out the symptoms of lead poisoning

489. Find out if Satan and Lucifer are actually the same

490. Find out who Vishnu is

491. Find out if Dudley Dooright ever did wrong

492. Compare and contrast the Naked Gun vs. Spaceballs

493. Find out if there really was a Seinfeld curse

494. Find out where “Leaping Lizards” originated from

495. Write a book review for Geek Love

496. Find out which desert is the deadliest: Gobi, Sahara or Mojave.

497. Decide if you’d rather be a sneech with or without stars

498. Find out of the Lorax was an environmentalist or just a crybaby.

499. Decide the best Shel Silverstein poem

500. Decide if there is a point to laser tag

501. See if it is possible to “lose yourself in the music, the moment”

502. Find out how “rub someone out” and “rub one out” got so very different meanings

503. Fold something origami style

504. Find out about the Yaki tribe

505. Figure out if “Who’s on First” is still funny

506. Find out if there is a connection between IKEA and Pottery Barn

507. Figure out if Mary Poppins was a witch or an angel

508. Count how many words begin with the letter “Q”

509. Find out more about the Ogallala aquifer

510. Find out if Donkey Kong and King Kong were related

511. Find out if Mario and Princess Toadstool ended up together

512. Try to remember who framed Roger Rabbit.

513. Find out if therapy would have helped Porky Pig with his stutter

514. Find out if “diva” is just another word for “bitch”

515. Find out if someone has literally disappeared into thin air.

516. Find out if anyone still has the bumper sticker “Ass, grass or gas, nobody rides for free.”

517. Find out how many shows have had a fictional character on Jeopardy

518. Find out how many people drank the koolade when Jim Jones told them to

519. Find out how bad Sodom and Gomorrah were

520. Decide on the best salad dressing

521. Write about a really interesting conspiracy theory

522. Find out if they still make glow worms

523. Find out how horseflies got their name

524. Find out who one the most Bud Bowls

525. Talk about the world ending in 2012

526. Ponder how your life has changed since starting this blog

527. Find out what a quark is

528. Try to remember your past addresses

529. Find out the lyrics to Reading Rainbow

530. See if anyone would describe you as opinionated

531. Find out if woman would rather be “ogled” or “leered at”

532. Figure out what celebrity Artemis would be like if she were a real person

533. Find out if the next generation would really rather be famous than rich

534. Find out what legal hoops kids must go through if they want to divorce their parents.

535. Recall your teenage crush on Shania Twain

536. Find out where locusts still wreak havoc

537. Figure out why you like reading Diablo Cody’s column

538. Find out what happened to Joel Stein

539. Find out how Santa Claus got a sleigh, but the Easter Bunny has to hop around everywhere.

540. Find out why the tooth fairy would be interested in collecting teeth

541. Find out what happened to Mr. Yuck

542. Figure out how Violet Bick got down on her luck

543. Find out why that tourist was accidental

544. Find out what a black hole sun actually is

545. Find out what purported mean

546. Figure out if “I Dream of Jeannie” is misogynistic.

547. Recall the story of the the Billy Goats Gruff

548. Find out who was worse: Mothra or Rodan

549. Find out how Matraca Berg was “Lying to the Moon”

550. Find out what happened to George “The Animal” Steele

551. Research the history of the Stanley Cup

552. Figure out the best USA network character

553. Talk about why you loved “The Magician’s Nephew”

554. Find out why ese is a racial slur

555. Find out if plumbers have to go to school

556. Figure out if the story would have worked if the “Beauty and Beast” sexes were reversed.

557. Remember someone that touched your life

558. Find out more about rumspringa

559. Find out if there was every a july bug

560. Find out why “pumpkin” is a term of endearment

561. Find out more about Noah Webster

562. See if it is possible to use music as a weapon

563. Explain how people should twitter responsibly

564. Use a chainsaw

565. Find out if anyone has ever actually seen a leprechaun

566. Find out how much of a drug addict Sherlock Holmes was

567. Recall your experiences with a pogoball

568. Find out the difference between Amish and Mennonite

569. Find out if Appalachia is really as backwards as I believe it is

570. Find out why Stewie Griffith speaks with a British accent

571. Judge whether the Columbia statue is attractive or not

572. Find out if strobe lights can cause seizures

573. Find out if curiosity ever killed a cat

574. Find out more about Bronko Nagurski

575. Find out more about Gordy Howe

576. Find out what colors qualify as neutral

577. Find out if orange juice is the most popular in America

578. Find out who made the first screwdriver

579. Find out what a damask is

580. Play a game of MASH

581. Find something that could be described as garish

582. Find out what animal makes up the largest percentage of roadkill

583. Make wassail

584. Find out more about the country of Malta

585. Find out if there is such a thing as a vagabond king

586. Find out where the term “elbow grease” originated

587. Find out the origin of confetti

588. Find out if the first peach basket used in basketball games is in a museum

589. Find out if the same lithium that is used in batteries is used on schizophrenics

590. Find out if anyone is credited with being the first gold digger

591. Find out the most contagious disease in the world

592. Lick the bowl from a batch of brownies

593. Decide whether Diane Chambers or Rebecca Howe was a better Cheers character

594. Find out the most common job in America

595. Find out who wrote “Home on the Range”

596. Find out what a zephyr is

597. Find out if Zenith still makes televisions

598. Find out if some adult multiples still speak in a twin language

599. Find out what the most common addiction is

600. Find out what Jiminy Cricket did after Pinocchio

601. Find out if anyone has every referred to something as “glorious agony”

602. Make a shoebox diorama from a scene in the Crimean War

603. Find out what the dictionary definition of “pilgrim” is

604. Find out more about vaudeville

605. Find out if Laurel and Hardy liked one another

606. Find out how many Caribbean islands there are

607. Find out who won the first Heisman

608. Find out more about Johnny Unitas

609. Figure out when someone is mentally an adult

610. Take a blind taste test of coke versus pepsi

611. Find the most popular non-search engine site on the Internet

612. Find out more about nudists

613. See how many licks it takes to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop

614. Find out how many earthquakes there are a year

615. Find out how many people are philatelists

616. Discuss the virtues of skim milk

617. Find out when granite countertops came into fashion

618. Eat snow

619. Find out how “poopsie” became a term of endearment

620. Rankle with something

621. Draw a sad little horsey

622. Find out where the world’s largest tepee is

623. Cover your face with pudding

624. Eat nothing but yogurt for one day

625. Find out when the term “blue light special” entered the lexicon

626. Find out what “Rock the Casbah” means

627. Take out your frustrations on an inanimate object

628. See how many words you can rhyme with “kelp”

629. Figure out why Jack Sprat could eat no fat

630. Find out why Jack had to jump over a candlestick

631. Figure out how to glow in the dark

632. Try to think nothing but positive thoughts for one whole day

633. Find out what it means to have grace

634. Figure out why Larry David is so funny

635. Grow mold on a piece of bread

636. Flip flop meals for one day, dinner in the morning and breakfast at night

637. Find out the best compliment ever given to someone

638. Let bygones be bygones about something

639. Make a mud pie

640. Figure out why Clark Kent would love Lois Lane

641. Crack an egg over your head

642. Find out who is the highest motivational speaker

643. Find out how to become a motivational speaker

644. Whittle something

645. Find out how to become a notary public

646. Find out where “in the red” and “in the black” originated from

647. Find out if Jenny Craig was actually fat at one point

648. Find out how to do the flamenco

649. Find out how much television the average American watches

650. Figure out what “dignity” actually is

651. Imagine how smelly it was during the Constitutional Convention

652. Figure out how New Jersey got such a bad reputation

653. Find out if its kitty corner or catty corner

654. Find out where big noses evolved from

655. Find out if confidence building is replacing real parenting

656. Find out if there is such a thing as an addiction to tattoos

657. Find out what my income would be in 1900 dollars

658. Figure out who FICA is

659. Find out what happened to Friz Freleng

660. Figure out if ignorance really is bliss

661. Read more about the bubonic plague

662. Do an elementary science experiment

663. Find out how much it costs to take the LSAT if its cheap enough take it

664. Find out when they stopped foot binding in Japan

665. Find out if they still stretch their necks out in some African Tribes

666. Find out what you have to go through to get your lip disked

667. Play on a slip –n- slide

668. Figure out what your favorite letter of the alphabet is

669. Find out how much gold is in Fort Knox

670. Find out how the town of Greencastle got its name

671. Find out how the cranberry began invading juices

672. Find out if people still make wishes at 11:11

673. Find out what things can be considered Ionian

674. Find out how ice cream has evolved

675. Find out about conjoined twins

676. Find out the most profitable gas station chain

677. Find out more about jellyfish stings

678. Find out how many names for snow that the Innuit people have

679. Find out how many hits come up when you google jubjub

680. Find out what the most expensive wood is

681. Eat a jelly doughnut

682. People watch

683. Find out more about Yogi and Boo-boo bear

684. See if you can understand the theory of relativity

685. Find out what are society’s woes

686. Do a jigsaw puzzle

687. Find out what Xenon is used for

688. See if they still make those T-shirts that change color

689. Find out what shellac is used for

690. Find out the titles people go by besides Mr., Ms., or Miss

691. Decide if there is life on other planets

692. Find out more about Area 51

693. Look up when Pluto is going to be destroyed

694. Find out what happened to Goofy

695. Decide whether Optimus Prime and Megatron can ever be friends

696. Find out why ET wanted to get drunk, eat Reese’s pieces and go home

697. Conjecture on why hormones make adolescents act crazy

698. Find out if “the pot calling the kettle black” is racist

699. Design your dream home

700. Figure out why Hitler was such a prick

701. Find out what gene therapy is

702. Reorganize your bedroom

703. Find out how many women find tractors sexy

704. Finish a cryptogram, cryptoquip or celebrity cipher

705. Decide how numbers make you feel

706. Find out if chaos is a person, place, thing or idea.

707. See how many adjectives you can use to describe lightning

708. Decide whether Santa and Mrs. Claus ever had any children

709. Try to find out whether or not you’re in the matrix

710. Find out how the world is out to get left-handers

711. Find out all the famous left-handers

712. Decide whether Humpty Dumpty was a major conspiracy

713. Complain about death and taxes

714. Wonder how Ben Franklin would react to modern society

715. Find out how many people, things or monsters are named “Gigantor”

716. Talk about why the Lunatacks were your favorite Thundercat villains

717. Find out how many people are rage-holics

718. Find out if Jumanji is an actual word in any language

719. Decide whether the opposite of hot is ugly or cold

720. Find out why foxes are so sly

721. Find out how evil hippopotami are.

722. Find out if stampedes still occur.

723. Read some more of the Berenstein Bear stories

724. Write a blog in language from the 20s and 30s

725. Find out what goes on at a vivisection

726. Find out who makes the best pizza in Lafayette

727. Find out if some men still have more than one family

728. Groan about the state of education

729. Find out why you’ve heard of Mumbai

730. Figure out the difference between kitsch and camp

731. Buy a welcome mat

732. Find out if hobos still exist

733. Find out if hobo songs exist

734. Find out what they call that sack that hobos carry

735. Find out what opulent mean

736. Build a scarecrow

737. Find out what Mafia means

738. Find out if being called a gringo is racist

739. Find out how to make a stinger

740. Describe when you experienced sloth

741. Describe when you experienced wrath

742. Describe when you experienced gluttony

743. Describe when you experienced envy

744. Describe when you experienced lust

745. Describe when you experienced pride

746. Describe when you experienced greed

747. Figure out if Courteney Cox ever made a good movie besides Scream

748. Find more about crustaceans

749. Decide whether or not supergirl is hotter than batgirl

750. Decide who Jack the Ripper was

751. Quote Ralph Wiggum

752. Decide on something that makes you pause for thought

753. Talk about eating, drinking and being merry

754. Figure out why the rest of the world loves soccer so much more than the USA

755. Decide who is you favorite of Santa’s reindeer

756. Figure out what it means to be “glam”

757. Figure out what heroine chic was and why it was popular

758. Find out what a zoning commission does

759. Find out how to become a city planner

760. Find out what happened on Bloody Sunday

761. Find out what happens on Fat Tuesday

762. Find out what happens on Ash Wednesday

763. Find out what happened on Black Monday

764. Find out if there is something called Blue Thursday

765. Find out when Casual Friday started

766. Find out why Saturday has never been special

767. Find out the health benefits of eating granola

768. After the rose, find out what is the most popular flower

769. Find out how flipping someone off came to be

770. Find out how much the most expensive paperweight costs

771. Eat a bowl of mulligatawny

772. Find out why they put cotton into aspirin bottles

773. Decide on a cool name for a new line of automobiles

774. Find out why silver bullets supposedly kill werewolves

775. Find out why wooden stakes supposedly kill vampires

776. Find out where the term “Grab that brass ring” originated

777. Find out how racehorses are named

778. Find out if a snafu and a bugaboo are similar

779. Find out who Ali Baba is

780. See if the book “Too Many Babas” is still in print

781. Find out if there is a difference between a bunny, a rabbit and a hare.

782. Find out what other countries have space programs

783. Find out if Helen Keller was nice.

784. Find out if Florence Nightingale really fell in love with a patient

785. Find out where the first indoor swimming pool was.

786. Find out on average how many people jump off buildings to kill themselves

787. Find out why its ever helpful to find the mode in a set of numbers

788. Find out when the stripper pole was invented

789. Make a travel itinerary for a world tour

790. Find out how many different types of squash there are

791. Find out more about Petunia Pig

792. Decide whether or not Olive Oyl is attractive

793. Play a game of Pitfall

794. Find out the difference between ginseng and ginkgo

795. Find out more about quicksand

796. Buy a sprinkler

797. Find a famous Francine

798. Find out more about the boll weevil

799. Find out who Bo Jangles was

800. Find out more about the World’s Fair

801. Find out how many jelly beans you can fit in your mouth

802. Make a lamp

803. Make a crepe

804. Find out if Paul Revere has any ancestors

805. Find out who the Moody Blues are/were

806. Find out the history of the cordon bleu sandwich

807. Find out how to make a compost heap

808. Find out more about the rough lemon tree and grafting

809. Find out if there is a recipe for clams casino

810. Make up a present day cast for Gone with the Wind

811. Do the 10-day master cleanse

812. Clean toilets while blaring hiphop music

813. Find out what happened to breakdancing

814. Find out more about the Cape of Storms

815. Find out who Old MacDonald was and why he had a farm

816. Find out what toe and fingernails are made of

817. Find out if there is a difference between PacMan and Ms PacMan

818. Find out more about the city of Tacoma

819. Find out how many Little Italy festivals there are in the country

820. Make a piece of wall art

821. Find out how to play “The Minister’s Cat”

822. Find the country with the longest life expectancy

823. Find out more about lilacs

824. Make a music montage of something

825. Make a list of things that are usually red

826. Find out more about “Talk like a Pirate” Day

827. See if you can make figgy pudding

828. Find out what a strumpet literally is

829. Paper mâché something

830. Find out more about freetarians

831. Find out more about fruitarians

832. Find out more about the career of a lumberjack

833. Find out what a shoe cobbler would have in common with an apple cobbler

834. Eat a snocone

835. Find out more about mistletoe

836. Find out more about the Magna Carta

837. Find out if the term “reefer” evolved from the word “reef”

838. Find out more about Grenada

839. Find out more about Chinese water torture

840. Find out if there is anyone actually named “Jeeves”

841. Find out where the term “ice princess” came from

842. Find out who Bess Armstrong is

843. Remember recess

844. Find out more about the saber toothed tiger

845. Find out who Mary Worth is

846. Write a headline for the ending of Lord of the Flies

847. Find out about more about different kinds of sharks

848. Find out if Sizzler is still open

849. Find out if it is possible to be “gruntled”

850. Find out if they still put dead bodies in the Ganges

851. Find out about the history of the changing of the guard

852. Find out about the history of nerts

853. Find out more about “The Alamo”

854. Read a summary of “Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead”

855. Find out what cake flour is

856. Find out more about napalm

857. Find out more about sorghum

858. Give up something for Lent

859. Decide who a real life villain might be

860. Find out the difference between a village and a town

861. Find out more about a glockenspiel

862. Find out more about well witching

863. Find out the history of vinegar

864. Decide if golf should be an Olympic sport

865. Find out how sugar is made.

866. Give the George Bailey defense of his father monologue in “It’s a Wonderful Life.”

867. Give the “To Be or Not to Be” monologue from Hamlet.

868. Give the Atticus Finch closing remarks monologue

869. “You look like a rube” monologue from Silence of the Lambs

870. Find out if a gage is an official unit of measurement

871. Find out the difference between a concubine, mistress, prostitute, whore and hooker.

872. Find out if there has ever been a real, proven psychic

873. Find out why the Hamburger Helper mascot is a hand with a big nose

874. Find out where there are American ashrams

875. Find out if Rand McNally was a real person

876. Find out if there is a difference between pancakes and flapjacks

877. Find out the difference between modern and post modern

878. Find out if muumuus were ever fashionable

879. Find out all the body parts that can be removed and a person still live without machines

880. Find out the worst rated national park.

881. Decide on the best Law and Order SVU ADA

882. Find out if Joanie really did love Chachi

883. Find out more about the Pacific Rim

884. Find out more about cumulonimbus clouds.

885. Learn how to do Jacob’s ladder with string

886. Find out more about Bluebeard

887. Find out what Cornish game hens look like alive

888. Find out all the symptoms of food poisoning

889. Find out what a barbette is

890. Find out what the white things in potting soil are

891. Find out what is the widest circulating magazine in the USA

892. Find out more about Boris and Natasha

893. Find out more about Polaris in the sky

894. Find out where Sputnik is

895. Analyze the symbolism in the three little pigs

896. Find out why the Morton salt girl is stuck in the rain

897. Find out where they still stone people to death

898. Find out what plankton really is

899. Play the lemonade game

900. Decide what your favorite nonalcoholic beverage is

901. Read a morality play

902. Find out the difference between sterling silver and regular silver

903. Decide on the top ten world events that have happened in your life

904. Find out what halogen is used for besides lighting

905. Find out if there are various kinds of harmonicas

906. Find out if there is a listing of the best bass clarinet players

907. Find out more about the uses of hemp

908. Find out the difference between a Windsor and half Windsor knot

909. Find out how to tie a bowtie

910. Find out how Grape Nuts got its name

911. Find out who has been the world’s most famous Lola

912. Find out what dailies are

913. Find out when khakis came into fashion

914. Find out what the best major is at Coppin State

915. Find out who Mona Lisa was

916. Find out how to grow almonds

917. Find out more about the first Thanksgiving

918. Find out more about Pangaea

919. Find out if force feeding is ever necessary

920. Find out about the different kinds of knots

921. Eat a Hostess snoball

922. Find out what is the definition of a putz

923. Find out how to do the Lambada

924. Find out how many people the French beheaded during their revolution

925. Find out the difference between ursine and porcine

926. Find out what makes someone a basket case

927. Find out when sundials went out of regular use

928. Find out more about Sid and Nancy.

929. Find out the rules of NFL contracts.

930. Make a list of the top ten Disney characters.






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